調派新員工指南

(中譯：Chris)

HOW TO PROPERLY PLACE NEW EMPLOYEES調派新員工指南

1. Put 400 bricks in a closed room. 在密室裡放400塊磚。

2. Put your new employees in the room and close the door.把新員工關在裡面。

3. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours. 不理他們，六個小時後回來再看。

4. Then analyze the situation:然後看看甚麼情況

a. If they are counting the bricks, put them in the Accounting Department.假如他們在數磚，就派他們到會計部。

b. If they are recounting them, put them in Auditing.假如他們數完又數，就派他們到核數部。

c. If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks, put them in Engineering.假如他們搞得整個地方亂七八糟，就派他們到工程部。

d. If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, put them in Planning.假如他們把磚砌得古靈精怪，就派他們到規劃部。

e. If they are throwing the bricks at each other, put them in Operations.假如他們在互測擲磚塊，就派他們到行動部。

f. If they are sleeping, put them in Security.假如他們都睡了，就派他們到保安部。

g. If they have broken the bricks into pieces, put them in Information Technology.假如他們把磚都打碎了，就派他們到電腦部。

h. If they are sitting idle, put them in Human Resources.假如他們無所事事，就派他們到人事部。

i. If they say they have tried different combinations, they are looking for more, yet not a brick has been moved, put them in Sales.假如他們說想過很多方法去弄，現在還沒想到，但一塊磚也沒動過，就派他們到銷售部。

j. If they have already left for the day, put them in Marketing.假如他們已經溜之大吉，就派他們到市場推廣部。

k. If they are staring out of the window, put them in Strategic Planning.假如他們在呆望窗外，就派他們到策略計劃部。

l. If they are talking to each other, and not a single brick has been moved, congratulate them and put them in Top Management. 假如他們在閒聊，一塊磚都沒翻過，就派他們到管理高層工作。

Finally, if they have surrounded themselves with bricks in such a way that they can neither be seen nor heard from, put them in Government !.最後假如他們把磚頭砌高，讓沒有人能夠看得到和聽得到他們，就派他們到政府工作吧。