最好笑的英文笑話

新鮮熱辣！在前天10月22日在英國的網站發布，據說是在網上搜集了1000個，然後由36個人投票決定最好笑的50個。

Revealed: The 50 funniest jokes of all time
 
有朋友看到了，又轉寄給我和其他朋友，說可能是語言和文化隔膜，看不懂大部分，不知道有甚麼好笑 ，問可否為他「解畫」。

現在我把頭12個逆序貼出來，他們認為最好笑的是最後的 No.1.。大家接受挑戰嗎：

12. My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed. I never knew they worked.

11. Went to the doctors and said: "Have you got anything for wind?" He gave me a kite.

10. A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."

9. I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already.

8. "Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass Of Home." He said: "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." "Is it common?" I asked. "It's not unusual," he replied.

7.  Two aerials meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The reception was brilliant.

6. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.

5.  A classic from Tommy Cooper - I said to the gym instructor: "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said: "How flexible are you?" I said: "I can't make Tuesdays."

4.  A young blonde fears her husband is having an affair. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she finds him in bed with a redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps off the bed and starts begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically, the blonde responds to the husband: "Shut up, you're next."

3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

2. Went to the zoo. There was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu.

1.  A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen."

The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me." The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."